Grief and loss have changed who I am. I cannot lie.
Now, I pray differently.
When I realized the first child I lost was sick, my mom and I started to pray; we prayed non-stop. Prayed for healing, we prayed for a miracle. However, we never prayed for peace and comfort, because we knew my son would pull through. I remember bargaining with God and making deals in exchange for my son’s life. My son didn’t make it. I realized just because I was praying for a miracle doesn’t mean my will would be done. It is GOD’S will that will ultimately be done and everything that God does happens for a reason. So now when I pray, I still pray for miracles, but deep down I know His will be done.